#KL112 such a big inspiration!!!
The Pakatan politicians made the following 10 demands during the Himpunan Kebangkitan Rakyat.
I, Helen Ang the budding politician, promise that if you put me in Putrajaya, I will most definitely:
1. Ensure free and fair elections, free PTPTN, free healthcare, toll-free roads, tax-free beer and ciggies and free lunches
2. Save the whales
3. Restore Penang and Malacca as British crown colonies
4. Divert 20 percent of Petronas profits as contribution to charity — old folks homes, orphanages, animal shelters, halfway houses for vagrants and rehab centres for twits
5. Safeguard the future of civil servants, including teachers and security forces as well as safeguard the future of lifeguards, bodyguards, tourist guides, yoga instructors, feng shui masters and MCA politicians after GE13
6. Clean up Subang Jaya and Selangor
7. Strengthen the national language in Selangor Times which is currently only published in English and Chinese
8. Free all the lunatics and let them run the asylum
9. Save our heritage, no more eyesore cramped highrise-compact-but-expensive condos in Penang; save our traditional kampungs, no more letting developers grab land and cut hills to build more eyesore cramped highrise-compact-but-expensive condos in Penang
“Save our heritage and traditional kampungs”. Rebuild Kampung Buah Pala to restore the heritage and traditional kampung of the Indian cowherds
10. Raise the living standards for women, pensioners, septuagenarians, octogenarians, foreign guest workers, pets, stray dogs, stray cats, farm animals, zoo animals and political animals
11. In Stadium Merdeka yesterday, Lim Guan Eng told you that Pakatan aims to abolish poverty in Malaysia
That’s not good enough. Anything he can promise, I can promise bigger
My political party not only aims to abolish poverty and end all wars but we promise to cure male baldness too
Besides our guarantee of world peace, my party will stop global warming, preserve the rainforest as well as save karaoke singers from extinction
Vote for me!
I solemnly promise you the moon and the stars. And best of all, you have my word that we’re environmentally friendly. Our rocket to take you to the moon does not cause any pollution at all as it runs on hot air